misery

Have you ever feel so lost, empty. like half of your mind or body just disappeared? well, i. am. very. much. lonely. right. now. i don't know. i am bored as hell when i have a lot of chores to do. my mind is else where. i want to say something or do something but i chicken out. worst come to worst. i have no one to talk to. or no one seems to understand what i am going through. THANK GOD THERE IS A BLOG. 

i felt so helpless that i have one submission to do but i can seems to have any ideas to write. (finish reading the other party's submission) for god sake, can we move to another chapter please. seriously, i have had enough with jurat. (insert crying face) oh god, i want to puke just thinking about it. It is like you are still not over your ex. like, come on dude! move on!

my friends did tried to understand me but i guess they have the wrong idea, or it was me putting the wrong idea. honestly, i don't know how to describe what this emptiness means?! it suck obviously.

i just want to feel at ease, do crap talk, not being judged and feel comfort. stuck at home suck. i don't know since when i have changed, but i think i no longer a home person. still love home though. but stay inside the house for a long period of time? i need time to adjust. i mean, i used to love home so much that stay at home not able to see sun for days is nothing. yeah, that was how  lazy i am much i love home.

here to many days of stay-at-home-dont-go-anymwhere.back to the days where mak had to chase me out of the house so that i go out and see the sun. back to 17 years old self who loves home so much that basically living like a caveman.

okies. submission is waiting in line patiently. need to entertain. 

doodles. xoxo.